Thursday, March 5, 2015
To be, or not to be-troth, that is the question
"Hello," Bianca hesitantly uttered into the reciever of her phone, silence for a moment then he spoke, it was the first time she had heard his voice in months, she could have never spoken to him again, but the business of her empty rental house with the belongings she couldn't fit into her VW beetle and Tylers Accord need to be addressed and Shane was no good at text messaging, said her couldn't read the small screen well, and communicating with June was out of the question. "Hello," he said, coldly,"I wasn't sure you had intentionally dialed me." He added. "Well, I did, listen Dad I really don't care what you do with the house, it's in your name I'm not going to school anymore so you could just apply my tuition money...er...the money that would have been for my tuition next semester and pay off the lease. The stuff inside is yours to do with what you will, you bought it and I don't want it. I believe that concludes our business so you can have June stop texting me." She said it all fast and matter of factly, just the way she had rehearsed it, she was feeling nervous now though, she was supposed to have hung up when she was finished talking, but she hadn't, she was hanging in the line holding her breath, with no idea what to expect from her estranged father. "Our business, Bianca, is far from over". Shane spoke authoritatively "regardless of your opinion of what I have done, or with whom I have done it with, I am your father, that has not changed, nor will it change simply because you say it should." Calm and cool Shane said his piece with unwavering poise, "Bianca, no one has set out here to hurt you, I'm sorry that things worked out this way but the heart-" Bianca was boiling "don't you dare, don't you dare say that the heart wants what the heart wants, ugh...let's push aside the fact that the statement is ridiculously cliche, but what are you even thinking? You have known June all of her life! You slept with her mother for Christ sake, she's my age! She was my roommate, my best friend-" Shane interupted Her rant abruptly "all of that is true, it wasn't intentional, and it certainly wasn't personal and the fact remains June is having my baby, your brother-". The words stuck her like a slap to the face...brother...the embryo was now a baby, a baby boy. Until then the pregnancy was just a tote bag that the affair was carrying around, it was just the mortar between the bricks of dysfunction but now it was a baby boy, a sibling....no, no Bianca rejected this, it was too much "no. Dad, whoever you are, how dare you act as if I'm the one who's scewed this, you impregnated my roommate and best friend, she barely even legal and now your trying to dangle this baby in front of me as if it should invoke some sense of...family, seriously dad it's laughable, I think you need a shrink or something, we haven't spoken in months and you've made no mention of it, I dropped out of school, no matter to you, I'm spun. Im completely spun." "All of those things occur to me Bianca, but baby, your a grown up, I never told you I wouldn't pay for school, I have tried exhaustively to reach you, you have made these adult decisions the same way June and I made ours and your pointing your finger at me and you've crucified June when all we have done is make some adult decisions, the same as you." Bianca couldn't believe he was rationalizing this, trivializing her broken heart and confusion. He was owning this situation, she didn't have words she was completely appalled but she couldn't hang up the phone, she thought it must be something broken inside of her that kept her on the line, or maybe she was just hoping for for some sense to come from him. She didn't feel and of old Shane in the man she was speaking too, he had become exactly what she had feared, someone else, it felt as if he'd forgotten her, it felt like he had outgrown the need for her affections, or perhaps June was able to fulfill all of his needs, emotionally and otherwise. "Bianca, this baby is coming, five months from now he will be a real living, breathing, soul and a member of our family. Listen, I've married June, I love her, she's having my child, and it was embarrassing for her to go to her appointments and check the "single box" on her paperwork, naturally it was the next step-". Bianca ended the call then, that had done it, not even the news of the marriage, that still needed to marinate for a while, it was his reference to embarrassing June, was he kidding? This drove it home for Bianca, June had replaced her. Here was Bianca, humiliated, confused, cast aside...embarrassed? Bianca was embarrassed! Tyler walked into the front door to find Bianca there her now 20 year old body slumped over the kitchen counter staring at her phone much the way she had stared at her mothers casket, empty, void of expression, she was reconciling her loss because Shane was dead to her, June was dead to her, Paris was dead to her. Tyler slung his book pack on the sofa and went to her, he wrapped himself around her body and held her in his chest until her tears came, he had learned the language of Bianca, he knew this state of her being had to be the result of speaking to her father, he had been waiting for this, he knew it would inevitably happen. He also knew Shane was not going to be able to cure Bianca's broken heart, in all fairness, what could he do abandon his pregnant lover, he knew that when all was said and done that wouldn't mend Bianca, someday Bianca would know that too, she knew it now, but she was too emotional to recognize it. Tyler held her while she purged her frustrated tears. He selfishly indulged in the sweet smell of her hair and the way her petite frame could be completely engulfed by his embrace, the way she was needing him these days made him almost greatful to Shane. Tyler didn't have all of Bianca until Shane gave her to him, he was going to marry her, "Bianca" he said, the first words he had spoken to her since arriving home, the proposal beginning to boil up from his guts, Bianca lifted her head and locked her eyes with his, "he married her" she said softly before burying her head back into the safety of his chest. Shane pushed the marriage proposal back down inside of him, suddenly recognizing that Bianca in crises makes him feel crazy in love with her, "I'm sorry baby" he cooed, he scooped her up and carried her to the couch where he effortlessly sat with her in his arms, they sat that way for hours, talking, Tyler's arms never loosening their hold on Bianca, and Bianca left her head nuzzled into his chest until they both fell asleep.
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Keep em coming love, keep em coming love; don't stop it now, Don't stop it now. Woo-hoo!
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